Monday, December 5, 2011

Der Christmas Mirror (A true story...)

The holidays were approaching and so also my seasonal recitation of anguish. This holiday season – all the more! Chris had completely emptied herself in commitment and effort. An extraordinary wife, mother, and fellow bread-winner, she deserved something special – something extra-ordinary. What would it be and how could I surprise her with it?

As with each holiday celebration our home would be filled with family and friends. I dreamed of one day owning a professional ping-pong table. I could see in my minds eye the family enjoying holiday tournaments. Chris, on the other hand, dreamed of a
beautiful living-room fire-place with its towering pillars and grand sunken mirror. This year, on Christmas morning, I would see to it that she got her wish!

I began construction in October. My anguish grew as December 25 seemed to approach more rapidly than in previous years.

It was two weeks until Christmas day and I needed only to have Bob deliver and install the mirror. He’d measured, weeks before, the four foot by six foot pocket into which the mirror was to be installed. My anxiety increased as each day passed. Would Chris once again be forced to lovingly thank me for my “good intentions?” NOT THIS YEAR! I HAD to finish the project!

Finally, December 23, the white panel truck backed into our driveway. Bob’s crew carefully untied the package from its resting place in the truck.

“Veer do you vant us to poot her?” the tall blond Swede asked.

I proudly pointed to the empty pocket above the fireplace. It was obvious to me the young man was confused by my response.

“You vant us to poot her up deer? Vee don’t do any-ting like dat sir.” The Swede was emphatic.

“Look,” I began to fume, “I’ve waited over three weeks for this! Bob promised he would have it here for Christmas! He promised it would be delivered and installed and that’s just what you are going to do!” Secretly, my outburst caused me to swell with pride. I was fighting for my honor, for my wife, for my MIRROR!

We argued back and forth for over thirty-minutes. I was not going to lose this battle. I positioned myself in front of the exit. They new they were trapped. With nail gun in hand in preparation for the installation and framing I demanded, “You are going to install that mirror and you are going to do it NOW!

Their puzzled expression and then uproarious laughter caught me by surprise.

“Mirror? Yimminy mee-ster; veer delivering der ping-pong table yer vife ordered!” Chris had once again beaten me to the punch!

The mirror arrived later that afternoon. Bob was kind enough to install it. Its reflection above our fireplace was everything Chris had dreamed it would be. Each holiday season now brings with it the warmth of our fire, a reflective chuckle, and fond memories of two people’s love expressed in “Der Ping-pong Table and Der Christmas Mirror.”

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